Sunday, July 30, 2006

Pam Anderson's Wedding Album

They're here!



Pamela Anderson has remarried and the pictures are out! I like the look. If I get married I'm going to have my wedding pics taken with a telephoto lens from a rowboat a half mile away, too.

We should rejoice that Pamela Anderson no longer carries the burden of being a single mother and she can now redirect our attention to her traditional burdens...



My understanding is that they are deployed in the sunlight and then retracted at night for more convenient storage:



I'm not an engineer, but I have used a teeter-totter. I think if Pam tossed one of them over her shoulder and onto her back they'd balance out and she'd be able to walk without artificial support.



Well, this is sad. Some nere-do-well has flipped her onto her shell and she's unable to right herself.



Pam! MOVE AWAY FROM THE EDGE OF THE BOAT!



Doh! Too late!



Why does Pam make me think of a movie by 1950's sci-fi director George Pal... hmmm...



Ah! Now I remember!



Best Wishes Pam! May this be the marriage you always dreamed of.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Fat and Happy

Yet another sign that America has gone astray:


What the hell happened!?!

Who is responsible for this outrage?

I know black is supposed to be very slimming but there's something more going on here than the absence of a tank top.

Clearly, Republican rule has lasted too long. A Hollywood icon has taken on the form of Dick Cheney.


While I'm out back vomiting, you can read this non-surprising report from Reuters:

More Americans too fat for X-rays, scans

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - More and more obese people are unable to get full medical care because they are either too big to fit into scanners, or their fat is too dense for X-rays or sound waves to penetrate, radiologists reported on Tuesday.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Four more to go...

Maybe not the one anyone was hoping for...


but perhaps the more interesting of the set:


Of course, Lance Bass's coming out probably means 'N Synch will be abandoned by their core audience (I envision a class-action lawsuit on behalf of disillusioned 13-year-old girls) but I think Lance has a secure future selling autographs to that other kind of male who has scant thoughts of women: Star Trek convention attendees.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

The spider has landed



It was a dark and stormy night when I was working on my computer and noticed a small spider rappelling down from the ceiling on his tiny spider thread over my monitor. He stopped just short, and carefully touched one leg to the top of it. Then he turned around and climbed back up his thread to the ceiling.

About 10 minutes later this same spider (I presume) was coming back down, this time about a foot to the right, over my floppy drive case (this was waaaayyyyy back when floppy drives were separate peripherals). Again he stopped just short and tested the surface with one foot. And again, he scrambled all the way back up to the ceiling.

OK, 10 more minutes later, the same thing except now he's coming down in the small desk space between my monitor and my floppy drive. Again he stops just short and tests the desktop with one foot. "Just right", he decides. He disembarks from the invisible thread and then runs off down the back of my desk.

Mission accomplished I guess.

The picture above is not of any of my personal spiders. It's from a study comparing normal spiders and coffee-drinking spiders. No mention of what the spiders discussed over their coffee or if they had a side-order of flies to go with it.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Television for the thinking cat

None of my pets ever took much notice of television. On or off, it was as if it was not there.

Until a PBS program called "David Attenborough's The Life of Birds" showed up. If that came on while my cat, Boris (the wonderful hand-shaking cat), was in the house he would slink into the living room, sit down in front of the TV, quietly watch the screen, then leave when it was over. No other program ever drew that response.

I thought he overdid his show of interest, however, when called the station with my credit card during pledge week to request more programs like that.

Hey, the birds are pretty clever too. Check out this clip from Attenborough's show. You've probably heard that some birds will imitate other birds, but listen to what this bird imitates...

Friday, July 14, 2006

All they're really going to get



I don't know why reporters go to Presidential news conferences anymore. They don't get answers to their questions, they just get "talking points" replayed to them. Not that the reporters have asked any good questions for a long time.

Every time George W. Bush opens his mouth I hear Floyd R. Turbo. In fact, I'm beginning to think Johnny Carson isn't really dead. Floyd R. Turbo seemed like heavy-handed comedy in the 70's, but today he sounds like standard Republican talking points.

P.S.

Just saw this bit in a CNN article about a new poll showing two-thirds of the country saying they will vote Dem this fall...

But a Democratic takeover of either the House or Senate would be disastrous for the president,...
As if letting him have everything he wanted has not been a disaster in itself.
...leaving both his agenda for the last two years in office and the chairmanship of investigative committees in the hands of the opposition party.
What's the worry? Only evil-doers need to worry about being investigated, right?

Be glad he didn't invent the camcorder



New revelations indicate relativity genius Albert Einstein had a number of affairs and often wrote letters about them to friends and family.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Patrick Stewart still not hot

I've met guys who said they thought Patrick Stewart was "really hot". That is serious trekkiedom. Frankly, I just didn't see it. But when I heard they had given him a digital facelift for the new X-Men movie I thought I should at least take another look.

Here's the current bald-and-wrinkled Patrick Stewart:


and here's the 30-years-computer-subtracted Patrick Stewart:

Hmmm... nope, that's still looks like a bald guy to me.

Just for comparison here he was in his "Shakespeare" days...


Good legs, but... no, i'm still not smitten.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006